


The last first kiss(es)

by bioticfox (ayambik)



Series: How to date your superiors [3]
Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: First Date, First Kiss, M/M, Mostly Fluff, Multi, Polyamory, Pre-Poly, Venko, mShenga, mShenko, me1 mshenko, me3 mshenga, me3 venko, mshega, pre-me3 shega, teeny tiny bit of angst at the beginning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-07
Updated: 2017-08-07
Packaged: 2018-12-09 20:57:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,377
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11676942
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ayambik/pseuds/bioticfox
Summary: Kaidan shares his regrets, John takes the chance, and James knows how to be bold.





	The last first kiss(es)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [BardofHeartDive](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BardofHeartDive/gifts).



> Prompt: First kiss.
> 
> The last section follows on from the last one I wrote for Bard, so you may wish to read that first [ here ](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8559064) but I don't think it's strictly necessary.
> 
> Mrs Bard: I hope you like this and that it fills your prompt satisfactorily <3 
> 
> Thank you to Potions for being an awesome beta and title helper. Title helperer. Title helper with-er. Basically any grammatical accuracy that follows is because of this lady here. Give her praise. And back rubs. However I did make changes after she went through with a fine tooth comb, so apologies for that.

Looking back, Kaidan should’ve kissed John earlier. If he'd known they were going to be torn apart, he liked to think he would've taken the chance much sooner. Been braver. Cared less about protocols and what the brass might think. Looking back, Kaidan wished he'd followed his heart a little more and his head a little less.

He had loved John more than he dared to say in their short time together; it had been too soon for declarations. They'd barely been dating, taking stolen moments and kisses when they could catch one second alone. A relationship between two crew members wasn’t forbidden as such, with the Alliance turning a blind eye in most cases. But they wouldn’t be able to look the other way when it came to a commanding officer fraternising with their subordinate. So they tried to keep themselves to themselves for fear of being reassigned, but in the end Kaidan was helpless against John's pull. No matter how much he tried, he always found himself caught in the current.

Everything about their short romance was intense, from the first glances to finally falling into each other's arms. And their first kiss said everything they couldn't. _Not yet. Soon..._

"You make me feel _human_ , Shepard."

That was as close as Kaidan could get, but he could taste the unsaid words all the same. They spent one glorious night together, followed by one glorious month, before it all came crashing down around them. Kaidan was left with nothing but a memory of a man that used to be, and the words turned to bitter ash in his mouth.

 

\---

 

James and Shepard's first kiss was...not good. They had been flirting back and forth for weeks now, but James had been trying not to read too much into it. He was here to do a job and there was no way that _Commander John Shepard_ would actually be interested. Shepard was probably just bored. Restless. Going stir crazy stuck under house arrest. Flirting with Vega was probably...’stress relief’. A way to pass the time. Nothing more. And James _should not get his hopes up_. That was his mantra, to keep himself from doing something stupid. He repeated it, day in and day out, right until Shepard had him up against the bench, lips pressed firmly against his own.

And James' brain short circuited. Shepard was _kissing_ him. John Shepard was kissing _him_ and _shit_ , he should be kissing _back._ Too late. Shepard was already pulling away with a faint frown, sharp eyes roaming James' face and assessing. Calculating.

"I'm sorry, James," he began hesitantly, eyes darting to the floor, "I guess I misread the situation." He scrubbed his hand over his face. "Must be going crazy in here. Seeing things that aren't there."

"No! That's not...no." James inhaled shakily as he regarded the other man. "I mean, you didn't misread anything. I just...wasn't expecting it, that's all."

James had thought about this a lot. _A lot_ \- a lot. But he'd put it down to a one-sided crush on his part. And then chastised himself for having a childish infatuation in the first place.

"It's just, I mean, you're _Commander Shepard_. I didn't think you'd actually be interested."

Shepard raised his eyebrows in response. "I'm not a Commander anymore, James. I'm not even Alliance right now. Not really. I'm just John."

"John..." he breathed. It wasn't the first time he'd let the name roll of his tongue, but it was the first time he let himself think about the implications. It wasn't ‘Commander’ or ‘Lieutenant’, ‘Shepard’ or ‘Vega’. It was just John. And _John_ was waiting patiently for James' decision.

And now that James was allowing himself to think about it, _really_ think about it, he found he didn't want to let the opportunity pass him by. He deliberately locked eyes with Shepard and slid his hand up to the back of John's shoulders, pulling him closer.

Their second kiss was much better.

 

\---

 

James first kissed Kaidan after a poker game. The two of them had bonded these last few months, over card games, beer and their mutual never ending worry of the man currently alone in his cabin. And when they had found out that they both had a past relationship with that man, however brief, they’d bonded over that too.

"I fold," Kaidan sighed, defeated, and threw his cards down on the table. "You win. _Again_."

James huffed out a laugh and reached to collect his winnings.

"You want to go another round, Alenko? I could use the extra credits."

"The way my luck has been going, I might as well just hand them over. I'm done."

"I wouldn't complain if you did," James laughed again. He was having a good night and didn't want it to end just yet. James found that Kaidan was surprising easy to talk to. Easy to be around. No pressure. He provided a nice distraction from....everything. From the Reapers, the war. From _Shepard_. It didn't hurt that Alenko was easy on the eyes, too.

"Want a beer?" he called, getting up from the table.

"Hmm? Oh, sure," Kaidan looked up from where he'd gotten distracted by his omni-tool. "I think there might still be a couple of bottles in the cooler, if you want to grab those."

"That better not be work, Major," he said, looking over his shoulder. "That's not allowed at my table. Not tonight."

"Ah, erm. Guilty, I guess," he said, as he quickly shut the omni-tool down. "It's hard to forget about it all, sometimes."

"I get that. There's a lot out there to be thinking about," he moved to the corner couch near the observation window, handing over a bottle when Kaidan joined him, "but sometimes a little distraction is necessary."

They spent the next few hours just talking, switching to drinking Kaidan's favourite hand-roasted coffee half way through the evening. Neither was quite sure when talking became kissing, but they were both sure how _right_ it felt. It felt right as James sucked on the other man's lower lip, and definitely right as Kaidan's hands roamed up and down his torso.

James _definitely_ didn't want the evening to end _just_ yet. He gently pushed until Kaidan was lying down against the cushions.

“EDI, do me a favor?” he said, in between kisses.

“Yes, Lieutenant?”

_"Lock the door."_

 

\---

 

_"So....where do I fit in?"_

_"You fit, Vega” said Shepard. Wherever you want. However you want. I couldn't have got through the last year without you, I don't want to lose that."_

_"And...you and me...we work well too, James,” Kaidan chimed in. “I think that we could have something really special, the three of us. It's going to be hard work, more so than just with two people, but I know it'll be more than worth it in the end."_

_"OK then. Willing to try if you guys are. So, where do we go from here?"_

'A date' they had said. And so here he was, on the dance floor, with John on one side and Kaidan on the other. James had thoroughly enjoyed his evening. Was enjoying it, in fact, right up until a shrill, obnoxious beeping started coming from Shepard's omni-tool. It even came complete with rapidly blinking light for maximum irritation. There was no way anyone in the nearby vicinity could miss the alert, let alone the omni-tool's owner.

John went from _easy-going_ and _relaxed_ back to _shouldering-the-weight-of-the-galaxy_ in 0.5 seconds flat. He turned and headed away from the dance floor, picking his way through the crowd. Kaidan caught James' eye and they both followed, setting their respective beers down on a nearby table. Their first date might be ending sooner than they'd hoped.

"It's Joker," the other man explained, shoulders slumping with a sigh. He only had to raise his voice a little to be heard in this private corner of the bar. Most people were still dancing, ordering the final round of drinks before last call, or in some cases making _much_ better use of dark, secluded corners. "I've got to get back to the ship."

"Is it an emergency? Do we need to request the whole crew back?" Kaidan pulled up a screen on his omni-tool, ready to send out the call.

"No, no. Just me. You guys can stay. Get another drink before it closes, have some fun," said Shepard, the light of his omni-tool standing out starkly against the cool blue lights in the bar. Kaidan paused, fingers hovering over the keys as he frowned, perfectly visualising James' thoughts on the matter.

"Like hell, Loco," he said, shaking his head at the other man, "If you go, we go."

He reached over and finished the rest of his nearly empty beer in one swig, clinking the empty bottle back down on the glass table, glaring at Shepard. There was no chance he was leaving without them. Kaidan snorted at James, decidedly not following suit. He left his beer on the table and turned to the exit.

"Come on Shepard, let's get a cab."

The ride back was as comfortable as it could be with them all crammed into the rear of the vehicle. Kaidan's arm was snaked around James' waist, and on the other side Shepard's left leg pressed into Alenko's right. The driver manoeuvred them through the Citadel, the lights flashing by in a blur as they headed towards the docking bay. It was a busy night. Skycars and transit vehicles filled the air, all packed with people making the most of their Friday evening.

"Oh, hey, the new Blasto movie!" Shepard said as the cab came to a stop at an intersection. James blinked at the outburst. He turned his head to see a giant illuminated holo-board, advertising the hanar Spectre's latest adventures, hanging across the street. The tentacled Spectre held three guns aloft as he walked ( _floated?'_ James thought) away from an explosion. Totally realistic.

"You wanna see it?" James tentatively suggested. Here he was being bold; their first date wasn't over and he was already hoping for a second. It'd been going well and the beer was making him brave. "Maybe if we get chance we can all go?"

"Hmm. That'd be nice, but it's out next week. We're not scheduled for more leave so soon," said Kaidan, letting go of Shepard's hand to squeeze James' arm, when James' disappointment filtered through onto his face.

"Anyway," John continued, turning back to the other two with a smirk, "no matter what, it'll never be as good as Blasto Four."

"Really? _Four_?" James was not letting that blatant inaccuracy go by. "No way, three was the best. Four was good, sure, but what was with those zero gravity slow-mo scenes?" The transit began to move again, leaving the advertisement behind in the rear view window, as they started to bicker over the various pros and cons of both films.

"Kaidan, settle this." They were nearly to the docking bay as John looked to the other man for his input.

"This might be a good time to point out that I've only ever seen the first one," came the slightly chagrined response. 

"What?!" Two outraged cries came from either side, causing the figurative and literal middle man to wince slightly at the volume. 

"Well, _that_ needs to be fixed." John said, immediately planning to remedy the situation. "If we get a quiet evening, we can get some queued up and have a movie night."

James was hopeful again for that second date. He wasn't sure if a night in was going to be as good as a night out, but he'd take it over nothing. The shuttle pulled up at their location and Shepard swiped his credit chit before the three of them stumbled out of the taxi and began heading towards the Normandy.

"What do you say, Alenko?" teased James as they boarded the ship, "Ready to watch the best Blasto film ever? Blasto Three, that is."

"Four," Shepard retorted, waiting for the airlock for decontamination protocols to begin, not missing a beat.

"Sure," Kaidan laughed, rolling his eyes, "Though you guys have to promise not to hate me if I don't like either of them."

"You will," James chuckled. John smirked.

With a quick glance at the door behind them, Shepard turned and moved in close. They all stood in a huddle, squashed together, chests touching. James slid one arm ‘round John's waist, as John gripped Kaidan’s shirt tightly with one hand. There was nothing else that mattered but the three of them right here and now. Time slowed, standing still until he felt Kaidan’s lips against his own, quickly joined by John’s. They’d each kissed each other individually before, but never had all three of them been together like this. It was perfect and despite the little time they had left of their evening, they were unhurried, slowly exploring what they could of each other's mouths.

The internal door to the ship unlocked and they reluctantly broke apart as it began to slide open. In that instant, he watched the transformation between ‘John’ and ‘Commander Shepard’. And Major Alenko wasn't far behind. It wasn't the first time James had seen it happen, but he didn’t think he’d ever get used to it. Nevertheless, they were both amazing men and James felt _so damn lucky_ to be a part of this.

They entered the ship one by one and Shepard immediately began to make his way to the bridge. Joker was there, ready and waiting, wincing as he saw Kaidan and James following behind their Commander.

“Sorry to, err, _interrupt_ your evening Shepard,” he began. Did he know more than he should? James made a mental note to have a word with EDI. “We’ve got a slight problem.”

James came to a stop at Kaidan’s left (not too close, not too far away) and watched Shepard work. He glanced to the other man at his side and smiled to himself, even as he kept on eye on their other third. Everything they needed was right here. All the miscommunication and frustration from their previous relationships didn't matter anymore, they ended up right where they should be: together.


End file.
